When Una Cottrell walked into Manchester’s buzzing digital scene in her early fifties, she brought two decades of traditional marketing expertise, a sharp business mind, and genuine enthusiasm for the work. What she didn’t anticipate was becoming invisible.
“I was going to these business events, networking, having a great time,” Una recalls. “But I was slightly older, probably old enough to be their mothers. I wasn’t really getting much work from it.” The reason became clear: despite her proven track record, younger entrepreneurs didn’t trust that she could deliver in the digital age. To them, her traditional marketing background made her “a bit of a dinosaur.”
That experience of being overlooked, underestimated, and dismissed based purely on age would eventually spark something powerful: 45 Not Out, a platform that has become a lifeline for hundreds of women navigating the complex terrain of midlife and beyond.
A Pandemic Revelation
Like many passion projects, 45 Not Out emerged from a perfect storm of circumstances. After four years of “biting back” her frustration whilst building her freelance business in Manchester’s digital creative hub, the pandemic hit. With time suddenly available and questions still nagging at the back of her mind about how she’d been treated, Una decided to experiment with podcasting—a natural fit given her communications background.
“I started with a lady who lives in the same village as me, and it got a bit addictive,” she explains. “I ended up doing 21 episodes.” But more importantly, those conversations revealed something Una hadn’t initially grasped: the age-based prejudice she’d experienced as a businesswoman wasn’t unique to entrepreneurs. “I thought it was just older businesswomen that would get this kind of prejudice, but it really wasn’t.”
The podcast led to a newsletter, which now has around 250 subscribers. Then came a Facebook group, creating what Una describes as “a safe space” where women could be open about their experiences without fear of upsetting bosses or losing clients. Today, that community stands at 470 members strong—a testament to just how desperately this space was needed.
The Youth Obsession in Digital
Una’s frustration with the digital sector’s youth fixation wasn’t unfounded. The industry’s explosive growth had created a culture where being young and digitally native was prized above all else—even above the strategic thinking and psychological understanding that comes with experience.
“I had 20 years in traditional marketing. I’d learned and worked with some fantastic people who’d shared their skills,” Una says. “But these guys straight out of university didn’t have that depth. They were at the crest of the digital explosion and did incredibly well without maybe having the experience they probably needed.”
The irony isn’t lost on her that one of Manchester’s most prominent digital entrepreneurs, Steven Bartlett of Social Chain fame, once had a policy of never hiring anyone over 26. His opinion has changed as he’s got older
Even Bartlett’s evolution, however, doesn’t erase the years of talented, experienced professionals who were shut out based on arbitrary age limits. It’s a reminder that ageism in business isn’t just about individual bias—it’s baked into policies and company cultures.
More Than Networking: Building Authentic Community
In an era where the word “community” gets thrown around liberally, often as a marketing term for email lists or customer bases, Una is clear about what genuine community actually means.
“It’s a place where like-minded women come together and they know it’s a safe space,” she explains. “It’s populated with people who think like they do and probably have similar lived experience.” That shared experience matters because, as Una discovered through her podcast interviews, this prejudice is widespread regardless of profession or seniority level.
Equally important is understanding what community isn’t. Una points to certain WhatsApp groups and online spaces that are “absolutely populated with businesswomen, all ages, but it’s just very salesy. There’s no authenticity, there’s no support.” When notifications from those groups appear, she ignores them. Real community, she insists, requires both authenticity and genuine support—not just a platform for self-promotion.
The Davina Effect and Changing Attitudes
Una has witnessed a significant shift in recent years, particularly over the last two, in how society views midlife women. She credits much of this change to high-profile advocates like Davina McCall, who has championed menopause awareness.
“Davina threw a spotlight on this demographic of women going through hormonal changes,” Una observes. “It made people realize—maybe company owners thought, ‘There’s a whole demographic of women who aren’t ready to retire yet. We’ve got all this experience. We’re probably not appreciating them as we should be.'”
The result has been tangible: major corporations introducing menopause policies, greater recognition of midlife women’s value, and a broader cultural conversation about this life stage. Una is careful to note that she doesn’t position herself as a menopause expert—”I’ve got no scientific or biological training at all”—but she recognizes how the menopause dialogue has opened doors for wider discussions about midlife women’s experiences.
There’s also a generational factor at play. Women who are now in their mid-forties grew up with the Spice Girls and “girl power” as a constant cultural message. That early empowerment, even if delivered through pop music, created a foundation of expectation—a belief that women’s voices and contributions matter at every age.
The Double Blow of Invisibility
The sense of invisibility that midlife women experience comes from two directions, Una explains, creating a particularly challenging situation.
“You’re trolling along, you’ve got your career, you’re doing really well, and you’re in your thirties and life’s great. Hit your forties and all of a sudden it sort of stops or reduces.” Women who haven’t changed anything about how they work suddenly find themselves passed over for promotion, losing clients, or simply not receiving the recognition they once did.
This external shift has internal consequences. “That feeds into your self-worth and your confidence,” Una notes. “If you’re going into work and getting ‘that was a really good report,’ that maintains your self-esteem. But when that stops and you’re not getting that reward, your self-esteem goes down.”
The second factor is biological. The brain changes that occur during perimenopause and menopause can significantly affect confidence. “I’ve heard such horrendous stories,” Una says. “When women hit that stage in their lives, their self-confidence takes a major hit.”
The combination of external invisibility and internal biological changes creates what Una describes as a perfect storm: “Those two combined—is it any wonder we’re struggling?”
Beyond Gender: A Human Issue
One of Una’s most surprising discoveries has been that these issues aren’t exclusively female. Through her newsletter, she’s inadvertently attracted male subscribers—she estimates there are a couple of middle-aged men who “sneak in” to her mailing list.
The revelation came through a friend of a friend, a 70-something former captain of industry who helped put Manchester on the business map in the 1970s. “He disclosed that whatever I talk about every week, men of that age experience as well,” Una shares.
This awareness has changed how she approaches her work. “I’m thinking, there’s going to be men in that situation too, so I need to write for them as well.” The insight shifts the conversation from men versus women to a more nuanced understanding of how ageism affects everyone, though it may manifest differently across genders.
Practical Wisdom: Three Tips for Visibility
For the women in her community and beyond, Una offers concrete advice for remaining visible in a culture that often overlooks midlife women.
First, find your tribe. This tip came from female tech guru during a podcast interview. “Find people who think like you do, connect with them, and keep in touch,” Una advises. “They can become your support system. You can bounce things off each other.”
Second, don’t be afraid to big yourself up. This goes against everything Generation X women were taught. “In our childhood it would have been ‘don’t get above yourself,'” Una explains. “So it’s like, if you’ve won a client or had a really good success, don’t be afraid of talking about it. It can feel really tacky at first. But the more you do it, the easier it gets, and your brain recognizes what would be good to post about.”
Third, join groups and be visible in them. If a group doesn’t resonate, leave and find another. The key is active participation—showing up, contributing, and building relationships beyond single events or interactions.
Avoiding Self-Sabotage
Una is equally clear about what holds women back, identifying three common forms of self-sabotage.
Don’t wait until you feel fully ready. In her office at home, Una keeps a reminder: “Perfect doesn’t exist.” Whether it’s launching a website, starting a Facebook group, or organizing an event, waiting for everything to be perfect means never starting. “Don’t sweat the small stuff,” she counsels. “If you’re worried it’s not going to be perfect, it doesn’t matter. Just do it anyway.”
Don’t hide behind the brand. While having professional platforms, logos, and branding is important, people buy from people. “You don’t give any personal stories out, but people buy people,” Una explains. Sharing personal experiences creates connection and memorability in ways that purely professional content cannot.
Don’t try to be everywhere at once. New business owners especially fall into this trap. “Find out where your audience is and really hold down in that. Get yourself established there first.” Spreading yourself too thin across multiple platforms dilutes your impact and exhausts your resources.
Looking Forward: A Legacy Beyond Business
When asked about the future of 45 Not Out, Una’s ambitions extend far beyond building a successful business platform.
“A passion project that I want to turn into a viable business—this year I’ve made some changes and I’m going to do that,” she confirms. But more importantly: “If we can be part of something that changes something in society, whether that’s government legislation or changing people’s thinking… it’s possibly going to be beyond my lifetime, because things like that don’t happen overnight. But if I could be at the start of that, that would make me a very happy woman.”
There’s no upper age limit to 45 Not Out—a point Una is keen to emphasize. The name refers to when the prejudice typically begins, around age 45, but the community welcomes women of all ages beyond that threshold. Next month she’s speaking in Hertfordshire alongside a prolific businesswoman in her mid-seventies who’s launching a new platform—living proof that the 45 Not Out ethos has no expiration date.
For Una, the mission is clear: to create spaces where women feel seen, heard, and valued regardless of age. Where experience is recognized as an asset rather than a liability. Where confidence can be rebuilt and futures reimagined. Because life after 45 isn’t an ending—it’s a beginning, full of possibility for those who refuse to be counted out.
For more info on Una Cottrell check out
https://www.instagram.com/unacottrell/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/una-cottrell-6b05ba21/
With over 60 attendees, Alex & His Sisters continues to be a standout networking event in Altrincham, bringing together inspiring speakers like Una who share their real-world insights and practical advice. A big thank you to Una for her engaging talk, and to all the attendees who make these events so impactful!
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